On Shaving (or not) + Treating the Body Gently

When the Question Becomes Personal

Most people are not taught how to think about pubic grooming.

They inherit fragments.

A joke from friends.
Something seen online.
A partner’s preference.
What counts as “clean.”

And a vague feeling that they are somehow supposed to already know what to do.

So when the subject finally becomes personal, many people feel unprepared.

Not just technically unprepared.

Emotionally unprepared.

Because decisions about pubic hair are rarely only about hair.

The pubic area — and the genitals themselves — are closely tied to questions of sexuality, attractiveness, maturity, comfort, exposure, shame, identity, and desirability — often all at once.

That can create a surprising amount of pressure around something that, on the surface, sounds simple.

Should I shave?
Should I trim?
Should I leave it alone?
What do people expect?
What if I do it wrong?
What if I dislike it afterward?

Is it going to be like this forever?

And because the uncertainty itself can feel uncomfortable, people often rush toward an answer before they have explored their own feelings about any of it.

But there is no requirement to answer the question immediately.

Slow down.

You are allowed to be undecided.

You are allowed to experiment without turning every decision into a permanent identity.

Confusion is a meaningful disturbance.

Some people genuinely enjoy being fully shaved.

Some prefer trimming.

Some enjoy maintaining and conditioning pubic hair without removing it.

And most move between different approaches over time.

Many people are still figuring out what feels best in their own body.

That uncertainty is more common than most people admit.

The First-Time Problem

Pubic grooming can take many forms.

Shaving.
Trimming.
Waxing.
Lasering.

Some groom pubic hair without removing it at all. 

But many of these approaches involve expense, planning, discomfort, vulnerability, or another person’s participation in the process.

And for someone still figuring out how they feel about all this, that can feel like a lot quickly.

Which is part of the reason a razor in the shower so often becomes the first experiment.

Alone.
In a hurry.
And often improvised.

Because the goal is often imagined as “perfectly smooth,” people tend to overdo it immediately.

They press too hard.
Take too much.
Keep going long after the skin has had enough.

And then there is the aftermath.

Sometimes pleasant.

Sometimes not.

Skin feels warmer.
More exposed.
Sensitive to friction.

The pubic region might be experienced differently.

Not just visually.

But through sensation, attention, and intentional contact.

For many, this is the moment they realize pubic grooming is not just visual.

It's sensory.

Gentleness matters.

A Gentle Approach

If you choose to shave, preparation helps enormously.

Begin by checking in with yourself.

Take a moment to notice what is actually bringing you here. Curiosity, pressure, aesthetic preference, comfort, insecurity, experimentation, sensation, attraction, change — often it is several things at once.

Be patient with yourself.

Many of those feelings are shaped — quietly and over time — by the cultural and social expectations people absorb long before they consciously examine them.

Cultural and social norms exist. 

The point is not obedience or rejection.

The point is awareness.

(that pause matters)

Spend some time becoming familiar with the pubic area.

The hair.

Its texture.
Its density.

How it changes across the body.

And the skin.

The textures, folds, contours, and sensations that make this place unique.

Pubic skin is often softer, warmer, and more sensitive to friction than people expect. It responds differently to pressure, speed, repetition, and irritation.

Which is why rushing tends to create problems.

Hair is usually easier to manage when trimmed gradually rather than removed aggressively all at once. Warm water softens both the skin and the hair, reducing resistance to cutting.

And when shaving does begin, gentleness matters more than force.

A clean, sharp razor usually works better than repeated passes with a dull one. Light pressure often works better than pressing harder. Skin that has become irritated will respond better to recovery than continued shaving. 

A shaving medium can help reduce friction as the razor moves across the skin. Opt for gentle products.

Work gradually. 

Over multiple sessions.

Shaving your pubic area does not mean you have to remove all the hair.

(and certainly not all at once) 

Your goal is not perfection.

It's attention.

On Use + Practice

Care is shaped as much by repetition as by ingredients.

The way a balm is warmed between the hands. The moment attention returns to a part of the body usually passed over. The small gestures that slowly become familiar enough to feel like instinct.

Use + Practice explores the lived side of care — not routines imposed from outside, but the quiet habits, observations, and rituals that emerge through repeated contact with the body over time.

These notes exist to ask how touch, material, rhythm, and attention shape the way we move through ordinary life.

• Explore More from Use + Practice
• Visit the Cult of Bees Apothecary
• Browse Studio Notes & Material Studies

⟁ Use + Practice is written and photographed by Len Luterbach.